Little phrases like "I don't do sun," and, "a tendency towards sarcasm" capture Carrie's personality in an economical manner that will also get a nice chuckle from her readers.
In general, the essay has a great balance of seriousness and playfulness, of quirkiness and intellect.
While you don't want to cater to people's biases, you also don't want to diminish your chances of getting into college.
Carrie, however, isn't one to tone down her identity during the admissions process.
Let me be direct: in some ways, I am the antithesis of what one might picture as a student who contributes to campus diversity.
I am white, middle-class, and heterosexual; I have no physical handicaps or mental challenges apart from a tendency towards sarcasm. My hair, naturally the same sandy blonde that the rest of my family shares, is dyed jet, sometimes highlighted in streaks of purple or scarlet. If I were inserted into those brochure photographs of typical college students, I would look like a vampire stalking her wholesome prey. Diversity goes beyond the physical; race or ethnicity might be the first things one thinks of, but really, it is a question of what makes someone the person that he or she is.I was drawn to this dark subject matter of environmental crisis, not to wallow in it or savor the Schadenfreude, but to change it and make the world a better place.Writing about identity or diversity for the Common Application essay presents a writer with specific challenges. It clearly captures the subject of the essay — approaching Goth with an open mind.Being Goth isn’t just about physical appearance; it’s a way of life that includes not only individual tastes in music, literature, and popular culture, but also particular beliefs about philosophy, spirituality, and a range of other human issues.To give just one example, I am planning to major in Environmental Studies, and while it might seem odd to picture a ghoulishly-dressed girl who adores the natural world, it was my Goth outlook that led me to this academic interest.Her essay blatantly states "this is who I am," and she makes it the job of the reader to overcome his or her preconceptions.There is a slight danger that she will get a reader who refuses to accept the "Goth" culture Carrie describes, but most readers will love the way Carrie approaches her topic as well as her straight-shooting style.Carrie clearly shows how she will add an interesting and desirable element to the campus community.The essay demonstrates that she has thought about identity and diversity, that she is open-minded, and that she has a thing or two to teach others about their preconceptions and biases.I read voraciously, and am drawn to subject matter that is somewhat dark; the more I read about humanity’s impact on the planet and the near-apocalyptic dangers posed by global climate change, pollution, overpopulation, the manipulation of the food supply and other environmental threats, the more interested I became, and the more determined that I should become involved.I, along with other members of my school’s Environmental Club, started a campus recycling program, and lobbied our superintendent to install in all classrooms power strips that are used to easily shut down equipment such as printers and computers at the end of the day, thereby conserving energy and generating significant savings for our school.